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Old The Sea Serpent's Call

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  #1  
Old 05-23-2010, 04:53 AM
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The Sea Serpent's Call

Just decided to make some more work on the sea serpent, in hopes that he may hear my praise and decide to kill me first... ...

The wind howled as the crew of the Scarlet Raider made their way to port in Tortuga. The days had grown long, and stores were already depleted. For weeks now, many members of the crew had eaten nothing but hardtack. Men were lost along the way; misfortune had followed them ever since they had returned with the hidden treasures of Raven Cove.

Night by night, a beast had followed them. Usually, it was seen only as a shadow, dark and long, beneath the waves, but now that they drew to port and shallower waters, the form became more and more real. No longer did it simply lurk as a nightmare; the dread of the sailors' minds.

"Captain, we have to throw it overboard!" the first mate, having grown up in the secluded jungles of Cuba, was prone to superstitious fears.

"The sea will take me before I let it go! Wealth beyond any before shall be ours when we bring it to Beckett! Nay, the charm shall stay."

"The sea shan't take you if you don't release it! In the stomach of the beast is where your grave shall lay! And a crueler fate even than the Locker that be. The jewel is not for mortal man."

The scarlet gem, woven into a cloth of gold fiber, was said to control the seas; to calm it, or to rouse it in an instant. It had the power to create land, and to plunge it beneath the waves. No name had they for it. Such things were to be left unnamed. For names have power, and more power the jewel needed least of all.

"I tell you, if you open your trap again, I will personally see you thrown to the beast!" The captain always made good on his threats, but this was of greater importance than the average squabble that broke out amongst crew-members.

"I will not let us be eaten by the foul bea-" Just then, the ship was tossed close to the verge of capsizing. The beast had come for its treasure.

The seas tossed the ship like so much driftwood. The form was all too real now; its black, scaly hide rose from the water; its head towering over the mainmast. The sailors fired their cannons. The beast roared, its head thrown back in a terrible snarl. Its ivory teeth gleamed as they crushed down on the side of the ship. The sound of tearing wood, groaning from the strain and finally breaking in resignation, roared in their ears. Desperately they attempted to fend it back, but its coils had begun to wrap around the hull. The ship was doomed.

Two days later, a fleet of ships of the EITC set forth from Raven Cove. Their objective: find the jewel. All they found was a piece of the mast and some scraps from the sail. But it's only a matter of time... Still the beast lurks. Be wary my friends. Dark forces are rising. This power attracts unwanted attention. And in the Caribbean, that is never a good thing...


Hope you liked it. A toast to the Serpent, whose power can both create and destroy. Just kidding.

Last edited by KeeperOfTheCode; 05-27-2010 at 12:24 PM..
  #2  
Old 05-23-2010, 05:11 AM
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Dang, that is intense. That's a heck of a gem they got there. Ah, the poor poor captain. You always listen to the superstitious crew members...

Very nice job Keeper! Maybe there will be something like this when the fishies come out, haha!
  #3  
Old 05-23-2010, 02:11 PM
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It wasn't all that intense was it? I need a critic here. If they like it too, I'll start working on more stories like it. Somebody please comment.

Last edited by KeeperOfTheCode; 05-23-2010 at 11:20 PM..
  #4  
Old 05-26-2010, 03:05 AM
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Nate Swordwalker Nate Swordwalker is offline
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I like it! The detail was good, especially when it was biting the side of the ship. Needed a critic?
Crest and I are here!!


And it WAS intense. The detail swallowed me whole as I read the first paragraph. Excellent work mate.
  #5  
Old 05-26-2010, 04:14 AM
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wow awesome awesome job it was so good!! very well written hope u do more!
  #6  
Old 05-27-2010, 11:55 AM
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Great job mate. Keep up the good work!
 


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