George The Noob and the Quest for the Lost Burrito

[Captain Jason]

I might be able to make one over a weekend, I'll PM you if I get sometime after Jack's comes out.

[Tiberius Fireskull]

Lol I felt special as Co-Author pib! Now your letting anyone do chapters!? Lol jk. And Jack, its not easy writing like a n00b. It takez practise. Liekz teh sportz dat u play n stuff? k?

[pieisbetter2]

Lol, srry mates, I'm not letting EVERYONE write a chapter, then it would just become a bunch of random people writing something different each time. However, I will on special occasions, let someone else try their hand at a chapter. And Jack, I'll PM you later about your chapter, there are many things that need changing, but otherwise I thought it was good

[Jack Sharkbane]

Thanks Bud, PM me the changes and I'll get right on it.

[pieisbetter2]

Originally Posted by Jack Sharkbane

Thanks Bud, PM me the changes and I'll get right on it.

Will do, but it might be awhile, been super busy ._.

[Jack Sharkbane]

Mmkay, whenever you get the time.

[pieisbetter2]

Alright, I'm just gonna write the chapter cuz the changes that would have been made to your chapter, it wouldn't have been the same chapter. ANYWHO, enjoy!

Warning: Some graphic moments. Cuz i mean, they ARE raiding a fort.

False Hopez

"Tis iz gona be a LOOOOOOOOONNNNNNGGGGGGGGGG search." George told them. He had a bit of anticipation in his voice, because there was a chance that they were holding the burrito here. They decided to let Britney go first as a distraction. He didn't argue, after all, he is just stumbling around and screaming his brains out.Britney ran in, grasping his hair, eyes wide, and screaming loud enough to break the sounds barrier. Several soldiers collapsed and blood started running from their ears. Their brains must have exploded. The ones who didn't pass out all turned their bayonets and aimed them at Britney, all at the same exact time. They started closing in.

"MOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!" George yelled before charging the crowd. Everyone looked at each other, wondering what kind of battle cry moo was, but they went with it and ran in after him. George was waving the lost sword above his head, but he didn't make much of an impression on the navy already. One stabbed at George with their bayonet. George tripped over something (nothing actually. Thats how big a noob he is) and came down, slicing the man's toes off. George got himself up slowly, in a noob fashion, and then watched as the soldier scream just as loud as Britney and then faint. He wasn't dead though.

Banana was graceful, even if she used a rusty cutlass. She hacked the Veteran's hand off, but the problem was he was right handed, not left. He knocked the sword out of Banana's hand, and was about to bring his sword down on her, but George came flying out of nowhere and tackled the man. He got up and told him,

"Oh snapz! U juzt got ur butt PWNED!" He then continued by flexing. When George had saved Banana, he accidentally made the soldier hit his head on a rock, so there was another, possibly dead.

Britney was curled up in a ball over in the corner. There were only two soldiers that he had to worry about. But they both weren't doing anything but staring at him with questionable faces. One poked Britney in the knee, the place that he was named after.

"Should we just kill him?" One asked the other.

"Why not." They were both about to bring their bayonets, and run them through Britney's stomach, but then, two bottles, one for each man, were smashed against their heads. They crumpled to the ground. One started coughing up blood, the other was dead for sure. I wouldn't be surprised. Do you know how thick those bottles were back then? No? Well I'll tell ya this. TOO think.

Anton was a BEAST. He didn't need no sharp pointy object to win his fights. He was so fast and so small, not even the worlds BEST ninja could slice him in half mid-air. He flew up one soldier's nose, and before he could realize that there was a super strong ladybug up his nose, it was halfway across the fort. Yea, that's right, Anton just freakin' ripped a dude's nose off. He grabbed his face and stumbled along before Anton gave him a nice kick and he followed his nose.

Soon, mostly by luck, the group defeated everyone in the main area.

"Well that *hic* was exciting!" Brandy yelled. He hasn't been sober for 7 years, of course he's going to yell.

"AAAAAAAGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!" Britney screamed from somewhere off in his corner.

"Shutz ur faceness Britney "

"Well I don't think we HAVE to bring Britney with us to continue our raid do we?" Banana asked.

"Noez, me no think so." George responded. But Britney DID come, he got up and followed the crew, eyes wide, and muttering some mumbo-jumbo to himself. They sneaked along, every once in a while having Brandy bash someone's head with a bottle. They eventually came to this bridge sort of thing where there were high ranking soldiers like Dragoons and Officers. They sent Britney running at them. He basically scared them out of their pants and sent them over the side. After making sure that the coast was clear, they all ran further into the heart of the fort. They eventually came to a room, and in the center of the room was a shrine. And on that shrine lay a burrito. But was it THE Burrito?

"No way." Anton told them as he flew up to it and sniffed it. "It's a fake, a trap, someone knew we were coming." Just then they all heard the clicking of loaded muskets. They turned around to see a large group of soldiers, all aiming their guns at the crew. I'm pretty sure Brandy didn't have anymore bottles to bash heads.


This one is longer then it looks, because there wasn't as much dialog. And sorry if it wasn't as funny as usual, I tried to get a semi-epic/funny battle in there. Combining the two is kinda hard ._. ANYWHO, next chapter coming whenever Davy can get it out, hehe.

[Tiberius Fireskull]

Not funny? NOT FUNNY?! You think that wasn't funny?!

Lemme say this pib: I should have probably used the bathroom before reading this.

[Captain Jason]

Haha, nice chapter! I kinda forgot to read it though.... Whos next?

[pieisbetter2]

I believe it's Davy's turn

[Tiberius Fireskull]

....so it is.... I shall work on it soon... eventually.... close to never...

I shall work on it...

[Tiberius Fireskull]

Fine Fine here you go...

Make sure that you haven't eaten recently, cuz you may lose your lunch.

Cutler Bucket

"GRRRAAAAAHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!"

Everyone turned to look at Britney. His face was as red as an apple, his eyes were bloodshot, and he was grinding his teeth so hard that George thought they may break. He was steaming with anger! No, not metaphorically! His head was starting to light on fire! BOOM!

"FLAGALGALAGALAGALAGA!!!" he screamed running around.

The Navy looked around, confused. Finally, one of them aimed his gun at the strange thing running around in circles. He took aim, and fired! The bullet hit Britney in the knee that he was known for. He dropped on the ground, still screaming and squirming.

"Uhh.... run?" Anton said.

"Where to?!" Banana screamed. By now, the Navy had recovered their wits and were pointing their guns back at the group now.

"I dunno..." Brandy said. "Maybe *hic*... ok I dunno..."

"I knowz what to do!" George said. The Navy by now were aiming their guns directly at the group, and would be firing in a few seconds.

George grabbed the burrito, and said. "With the power of the Lost Burrito, I will destroy you all!" Then George at the fake burrito.

"YOU IDIOT!" Britney screamed from the ground.

"Its a fake you fool!" Anton yelled. "I just said that!"

"Oh..." George said, before vomiting uncontrollably on the ground. The burrito was poisoned! He turned and started throwing up all over Brandy.

"Ohh... *hic*," he muttered. "I just bought these *hic* clothes..."

Then they heard a Naval marksman give his orders.

"Ready! Take Aim! And---"

"HALT!" a voice said.

Everything was silent now, except for Britney screaming on the ground in insanity and agony and the sounds of George throwing up. A man walked into the room. He was dressed in black and gold, with a sword strapped to his side. He must have been from the East India Trading Company. He had blond curls in his hair, and was quite short.

"My name is Cutler Beckett," the man said.

"Cutler *hic* Beckett!" Brandy cried out. "Don't you have good *hic* rum?"

"None to spare for a drunk man such as yourself," Beckett said firmly. He spoke with a british accent, much like Britney did... before he went insane.

George paused from throwing up for a moment to look up at Beckett. Beckett looked at George with disgust. George's mouth was covered with barf and he looked awful.

"Cutler Bucket..." George said with awe. His tiny noob brain wasn't good with names, as you learned earlier from him naming his crewmates. "I've been throwing up pretty bad... and you bring me a bucket! I can't thankz you enough navy pplz! "

"Wait, what?!" Beckett said in shock. Before he knew it, George was on top of him, vomiting all over him. "GET OFF OF ME YOU FOOL!"

"George likez bucket! " George said happily while throwing up.

"George!" Banana screamed. "Thats disgusting!"

"Get off of him noob!" Anton ordered. "He's one of the most powerful men in the Caribbean, and your VOMITING on him!"

George finished this cycle of vomit, and stood up, wiping his mouth on Beckett's sleeve. "I ist sowwy Mr. Bucket Man."

Beckett stood up, traumatized and covered with half digested food. He staggered while he stood, but managed to speak.

"Throw these fools into the prison at the top of this fort! In three days we shall hang them!" After saying this, he slipped in a pool of vomit. He looked up, his face covered in vomit, and said. "And put the lady bug in a jar!"

"THIS IS ALL YOUR FAULT GEORGE!" Britney screamed as the Navy dragged the group away, into the keep at the top of Kingshead. On the way they passed a bucket, laying on the ground.

"Help me!!" George called to the bucket, but the Navy dragged him past the inanimate object. George was starting to get mixed up between buckets and people now.


----------------------------

Forgive me if you lost your lunch while reading that.

[pieisbetter2]

LOL!!!!!!!!!!!!! xD Ok, THAT was EPIC. George is such a noob LOL. Great job man, I already have an idea for the next chapter xD.

[Tiberius Fireskull]

Make sure that George is still sick.

[pieisbetter2]

Hehe, i know, that'll be part of how they escape xD